Being able to manage our reactions to anger is a crucial ability to be a peaceful co-exister with others. It is crucial to control conflicts. If people don’t feel confident that you’ll address them in a rational and calm manner, they’ll usually respond by withdrawing and staying away. Allowing our anger to spill out with angry words and voices is not good for our well-being and is not healthy. Seeking Online Counseling from the best counselors at TalktoAngel would be beneficial.
Anger is a sensation that we experience, and is like sadness, joy, fear, joy, and sadness. Anger is a normal emotion and healthy, and it’s an indicator that something isn’t working with our life. It’s the result of two factors that are essential. The first is the feeling of frustration (Not getting the things we desire, particularly when we anticipate receiving that item) and the other is the feeling that others don’t value us or take us down of how we feel. If we experience anger in the form of a minor irritation it’s fairly easy to control our anger. If the anger increases in intensity, based on our expertise and capability, it could become difficult to control.
Phases of Anger
A cycle that triggers anger’s arousal has five stages: triggering, escalating crisis, and recovery. Understanding the cycle lets us understand our own responses as well as the reactions of others.
- The trigger is that an incident triggers an anger cycle to start. When we are involved in a fight or receive information that shocks us. We’re scared in a certain manner and our body’s physiological system prepares us to face the danger.
- The escalation phase is the time when your body is preparing itself for an emergency situation by increasing breathing (rapid breathing) and also a greater pulse and heart rate. When muscles are preparing for action our voice could become louder or shift in pitch as well as our eyes alter shape, pupils may grow and the brow becomes lower. Be aware of these next time you’re feeling angry. Your posture may change as well.
- The crisis phase is where our survival instincts take over to trigger a fight or flight response. At this stage, our ability to judge is diminished and decision-making is made in a way that does not require recourse to the most advanced levels of reasoning.
- The recovery phase occurs following an intervention that is made during an episode of stress. The body starts to recover from extreme stress and the use of energy. The adrenaline present in the blood slowly diminishes. The judgment quality improves as rationality replaces the reaction to survival.
- A post-crisis depressive state is a time in which the body is in a momentary state when the heart rate falls below the normal range to ensure that the body is able to return to equilibrium. The body’s consciousness and energy levels increase, which allows us to think about the events that occurred. There is a chance that we will start to feel regret, guilt, or even sadness.
Anger in Relationships
As mentioned previously, anger can be provoked by physical aggression. As well as the perception of injustice or unfairness or any other perceived injustice. In relationships, anger can trigger an unending cycle of anger and anger. According to research, being victimized in the presence of the individual you cherish most could cause you to become angry. The anger that is triggered can result in a reaction to the treatment that is demeaning and can lead to an unhealthy cycle of behavior like being self-centered, critical selfish, and cold, and the rage that follows with it.
If you look at what your lover does in a positive light. You can reduce the connection between your perception of their behavior and the angry feelings that arise in yours. It’s also helpful to stimulate positive thoughts, ones that are based on the acceptance of compassion, kindness, and compromise, not retaliation or rejection. If you’re ready to express your anger, be sure to express your anger in an optimistic tone. Even if you don’t feel angry, you could have been causing your spouse a rift through your sarcasm or using phrases like never, never, or worse. If you express an anger management strategy in a positive way and focus your attention on your own feelings and not focusing on your emotions, you are less likely to trigger an argument with your spouse and, consequently, increase the likelihood of creating this vicious cycle.
Strategies to control your anger
- Discussions are best delayed until you feel more relaxed.
If you feel that your anger has gotten to an extent that it’s becoming difficult to keep your tone and voice in check. You could choose to talk about the issue at a later time. You can say, “I don’t want to discuss the issue right now” and make arrangements to discuss the matter at a later time.
- What’s it all about? What do you want?
Find out what triggers bring you to anger. Is the reason for this particular incident causing an extremely angry response? Thinking about asking you “What exactly is it that I am experiencing? How do I wish another person to be doing, or not? Are my emotions in proportion to the situation?”
- Pay attention to your surroundings
There are many sensibilities we all have in past experiences that cause us to be more likely to feel angry when faced with certain situations. Anger may not be justifiable in the current situation, however, it may be due related to previous experiences. Recognizing the issue will be the very first thing in finding a solution.
- Get help in case you require it
If you’ve thought about the circumstances, you realize that you’re not in a situation to address the issue without blame or accusations. When you express blame and negative judgments frequently it results in an increase in conflict. Assistance in managing anger and conflict is essential. Feel free to seek Counselling Online from the best counselors at TalktoAngel.